‘I Will Demand a New Pair Be Placed Inside My Coffin’: The 30 Strangest Nike Air Monarch IV Reviews

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A corkboard with the 30 strangest Nike Air Monarch IV reviews pinned to it

Here’s the Deal

  • Almost 31,000 Nike Air Monarch IV reviews have been written by Amazon shoppers. About 22,000 are 5-star reviews.
  • Most of these reviews are relatively straightforward, describing what shoppers do (or don’t) like about the quintessential dad shoes.
  • Some are strange, though, as people come up with really weird ways to highlight how much they love Monarchs. We rounded up the 30 most unhinged Amazon reviews for these iconic dad sneakers.

Reading Nike Air Monarch IV Reviews Is a Ridiculously Strange Experience

Not surprisingly, the Nike Air Monarch IV is one of Amazon’s highest-rated dad shoes. It has earned nearly 31,000 reviews overall. Over 22,000 have 5-star ratings.

Most Nike Monarch IV reviews are relatively tame. They describe the quintessential dad shoe as “comfortable,” “durable,” and “high-quality.”

But if you dig a little deeper, you’ll also unearth reviews that are just downright strange. Creepy even!

Nike Air Monarch IV "White/Metallic Silver" dad shoe

From reviews that feature shoppers revealing that they’ve requested to be buried in Monarch IVs to those that refer to Air Monarchs as *ahem* “panty droppers,” people have found some really weird ways to heap praise on one of the best dad shoes of all time.

With the Nike Air Monarch IV “White/Metallic Silver/Midnight Navy” currently on sale for 30% off at Amazon, we decided to share the 30 wildest, weirdest, and most WTF Nike Air Monarch IV reviews from the retailer’s platform.

See what a bunch of overeager dad sneaker enthusiasts have written about the Monarchs below.

30. No Diggity

Nike Air Monarch IV review #30

Amazon Shopper: D. M. B.

Review Date: September 2016

Strangest Part: “As comfortable tenny grips go, these are the bomb diggity!”


Is this Amazon shopper this Redditor’s mom?

29. Get Your Shinebox

Nike Air Monarch IV review #29

Amazon Shopper: T Spa

Review Date: December 2018

Strangest Part: “Just a little polish and you’re ready to go to Outback or Texas Roadhouse for a night with the family.”


Applebee’s might be nice, too (quesadilla burger for me, 🙏!).

28. Well, That Escalated Quickly

Nike Air Monarch IV review #28

Amazon Shopper: Beenthroughitbefore!

Review Date: March 2020

Strangest Part: “He’s a terrible person who came in during the middle of the night and turned on the 4-burner gas stove without lighting it.”


It’s giving “If you see something, say something.”

27. Who’s Your Daddy?

Nike Air Monarch IV review #27

Amazon Shopper: Amazon Customer

Review Date: February 2023

Strangest Part: “Big Daddy 🤟🏻”


Shout out to Adam Sandler? (Sidebar: It seems like there should be more Nike Air Monarch IV reviews that include the word “daddy,” no? Step it up, y’all!)

26. Theeeeeeey’re Grrrrrrr…8?

Nike Air Monarch IV review #26

Amazon Shopper: Nan Wicker

Review Date: March 2014

Strangest Part: “These shoes are GR88888888888888!”


I know what you’re thinking. But Tony the Tiger wears Puma, not Nike.

25. Stocked and Loaded

Nike Air Monarch IV review #25

Amazon Shopper: Mark36

Review Date: November 2019

Strangest Part: “I’m stocking up for when we boycott China.”


What’s this guy’s basement look like 7 years later?

24. Walk It Out

Nike Air Monarch IV review #24

Amazon Shopper: the_Mike

Review Date: October 2023

Strangest Part: “I fit in perfectly with all the power mall walkers.”


Get in where you fit in, I guess?

23. Laying the Wood

Nike Air Monarch IV review #23

Amazon Shopper: Ryan

Review Date: September 2020

Strangest Part: “I walk into Home Depot, and they know I’m there to buy some lumber.”


This review also says Air Monarchs “hold grass stains exceptionally well.” *crying emojis*

22. Know Your Worth

Nike Air Monarch IV review #22

Amazon Shopper: John H.

Review Date: December 2025

Strangest Part: “They kept my self-esteem stable.”


Those who say, “Confidence comes from within,” have never laced up a pair of Monarchs.

21. Catching Strays

Nike Air Monarch IV review #21

Amazon Shopper: Dalton

Review Date: June 2021

Strangest Part: “Can’t have my boy walking around in a pair of NBs.”


Shots fired? The New Balance 608v5 might have something to say about this.

20. Leg Day Legend

Nike Air Monarch IV review #20

Amazon Shopper: Douglas W. Schmale

Review Date: April 2016

Strangest Part: “I mow the grass in them, run in them, work with oil and solvents in them. I’ve even squatted upwards of 400 pounds in them.”


Video or it didn’t happen.

19. What a Shame

Nike Air Monarch IV review #19

Amazon Shopper: Travis Tinch

Review Date: May 2021

Strangest Part: “I personally love the shoes, but my wife and kids say they are dad shoes and shamed me for buying them.”


No dad shoe shaming allowed in Nike Air Monarch IV reviews.

18. Fuel for the Fire

Nike Air Monarch IV review #18

Amazon Shopper: Robert

Review Date: August 2018

Strangest Part: “The best feature of these shoes is that kids tend to make fun of them, which only fuels my paternal pride.”


Also: “As long as you’re not single or fashionable, and very comfortable with the dad look, these shoes are for you.” What strange ways to say, “I love these shoes.”

17. More Strays?

Nike Air Monarch IV review #17

Amazon Shopper: BOBDOLE

Review Date: May 2021

Strangest Part: “When I step in front of a grill, I’m automatically in charge and other dads in their New Balances step back.”


Two Nike Air Monarch IV reviews with shots fired at New Balance? Them’s definitely fighting words.

16. I’m a Survivor

Nike Air Monarch IV review #16

Amazon Shopper: Dick Guggenheim

Review Date: June 2016

Strangest Part: “I always keep a spare pair of these sneakers in a fireproof safe in the event of some sort of natural disaster!”


Oh, this guy is definitely outrunning the zombies when the apocalypse hits.

15. So Addictive

Nike Air Monarch IV review #15

Amazon Shopper: Ryan T.

Review Date: July 2019

Strangest Part: “You’ll become addicted to the walking-on-clouds feeling. You’ll also become addicted to all the looks you’ll catch from the single moms and nods from fellow grill-masters.”


I was today years old when I found out that Monarchs Anonymous is a thing (just not the thing I thought it’d be).

14. Mr. Do It All

Nike Air Monarch IV review #14

Amazon Shopper: Uncle Terry

Review Date: July 2022

Strangest Part: “You can mow the lawn in your Nike Monarchs, and you can marry off your daughter in a pair of Nike Monarchs. Hell, you could get in a fist fight in your Nike Monarchs, then you could go to a funeral in that very same pair of Nike Monarchs.”


What can’t you do in a pair of Nike Air Monarch IVs?

13. Doggone It

Nike Air Monarch IV review #13

Amazon Shopper: David

Review Date: January 2020

Strangest Part: “If you step in dog doo-doo, it’s really hard to get it out of the bottom.”


People who wear the Nike Air Monarch IV 🤝 People who put “Please Clean Up After Your Dog” signs in their yards.

12. Passing the Torch

Nike Air Monarch IV review #12

Amazon Shopper: C. Loebz

Review Date: September 2019

Strangest Part: “My son wanted an all-black shoe to fit his ‘style.’ I showed him a picture of the Air Monarchs, and he said, ‘That’s it!’ I said, ‘Did you know they are also the most comfortable shoe on the planet, and all of the young ladies at school will be asking for your cell number?'”


The greatest gift a father can give to his son is his undivided attention his unwavering presence his unconditional belief his love for Nike Monarchs.

11. Happy Wife, Happy Life

Nike Air Monarch IV review #11

Amazon Shopper: Denis

Review Date: April 2022

Strangest Part: “Wife didn’t care about the looks. I didn’t care to start a fight because of a pair of shoes. Returned.”


“Siri, show me what ‘folding like a cheap suit’ looks like.”

10. ‘Til the Casket Drops

Nike Air Monarch IV review #10

Amazon Shopper: Luis

Review Date: March 2023

Strangest Part: “In my last will and testament, I will demand that a new pair be placed inside my coffin.”


Email me at [email protected] if you know someone who has actually done this. I want to ask them a few questions.

9. The Holy Grail

Nike Air Monarch IV review #9

Amazon Shopper: Joseph

Review Date: May 2017

Strangest Part: “Take tremendous cushioning, unbelievable responsiveness, and unmatched support/stability, hand sewn by Buddhist Monks using the finest authentic Tibetan Yak leather, and you have the Air Monarch.”


Also deserving consideration for the “Strangest Part”:

  • “The fact that these shoes cost under $850 is unreal.”
  • “When I first put this shoe on and walked out my front door, the sheer amount of women hitting on me was unbelievable.”
  • “These shoes gave me enough bounce and energy to dunk for the first time. I had never dunked in my whole life.”

8. Must Be the Shoes

Nike Air Monarch IV review #8

Amazon Shopper: Amazon Customer

Review Date: May 2023

Strangest Part: “The more I wore them, the more I walked. Until I met my new girlfriend, and that gave me more confidence. Which led to my promotion at work, and now I make the big bucks. So I tried the stock market and made a killing in Amazon stock. It’s the shoes.”


It’s goootta be the shoes!

7. 894 Million Miles and Runnin’

Nike Air Monarch IV review #7

Amazon Shopper: Nathan W.

Review Date: April 2023

Strangest Part: “Gym coaches, diabetic uncles, and crackheads rocking Monarchs since ‘03 have collectively put over 894,789,653 miles on these shoes.”


Oh.

6. Happy Spouse, Happy House

Nike Air Monarch IV review #6

Amazon Shopper: John

Review Date: June 2017

Strangest Part: “Unfortunately, my wife made me throw them out because of all the women throwing themselves at me.”


Always choose peace, bro.

5. “Haters Often Be Hating”

Nike Air Monarch IV review #5

Amazon Shopper: AnonTuna

Review Date: May 2023

Strangest Part: “Whenever I would walk, I would see all the suburban Dads walking, and I would notice how they didn’t look pained at all. They looked unbothered, moisturized, happy, in their lanes, focused and flourishing, and I couldn’t figure out how/why until I noticed something they all had in common — they were rocking ‘NARCHS. I internally debated purchasing these: ‘But, Anon, you aren’t a middle-aged suburban dad, you’re a 30-something-year-old Latino woman. These aren’t for you.’ ‘But, Anon, they’re so ugly, though; you would lose ALL street cred.’ Finally, after debating for a few days, I came back from a walk with my dog to my feet throbbing. My Crocs rubbed on my feet and created sores on the sides. I had had enough. I ordered my ‘Narchs and eagerly awaited them. They came in, and I immediately put them on. Instantly, my feet felt better. More than better, they felt like they were 17 again. My husband commented on how ugly as all get out they were, but haters often be hating.”


I would read a whole book written by this “30-something-year-old Latino woman.”

4. Miracle Worker

Nike Air Monarch IV review #4

Amazon Shopper: Dan dennean

Review Date: January 2021

Strangest Part: “I wasn’t even having sex, but I ended up with three kids.”


Is there anything the ultimate dad shoe can’t do? Sheesh.

3. Ducking and Dodging

Nike Air Monarch IV review #3

Amazon Shopper: Lil Dicky

Review Date: April 2015

Strangest Part: “Worst part about wearing these shoes is trying to get along with my day-to-day life whilst dodging women’s panties.”


What are the chances the real Lil Dicky wrote one of the weirdest Nike Air Monarch IV reviews of all?

2. Daddy’s Home?

Nike Air Monarch IV review #2

Amazon Shopper: Daniel

Review Date: March 2019

Strangest Part: “Nothing makes a woman wanna call you daddy more than when you throw these jokers on, slap on some jorts, tuck in your Dale Earnhardt T-shirt, and say, ‘HELL YEAH, BROTHER!’ If you can’t appreciate what these shoes have done for this great nation, I pray God has mercy on your soul.”


Damn, Daniel.

1. Sir, This Is a Wendy’s

Nike Air Monarch IV review #1

Amazon Shopper: Andrew

Review Date: July 2015

Strangest Part: “On 48 separate occasions, I have faced the reality of death or severe injury. On 47 occasions, I have been saved by these magical shoes. The only occasion where death was staring me in the eye, and I didn’t have my Air Monarchs on, was when I was in Florida at my uncle’s pool. I fell in the pool, drowned, died, and after several attempts of defibrillation, the paramedic decided to pronounce me dead. With the funeral set, they dressed me up real nice, and of course, put on my Air Monarchs. Boom, I woke up like nothing ever happened.”


What did I just read?

I’ll have whatever Andrew is having.

It gets no stranger — or greater — than this. The best of all the wild Nike Air Monarch IV reviews, by far.

My Review of the 30 Strangest Nike Air Monarch IV Reviews

My review is the last of the Nike Air Monarch IV reviews

I think my review of the 30 strangest Nike Air Monarch IV reviews says it all. I can’t wait to see what else you all have to say about the daddiest dad shoe out there. Keep the reviews coming!


Would you like to purchase a new pair of Nike Air Monarch IV dad sneakers? Visit the Dad Shoe Deals storefront to score the lowest prices on all the different Air Monarch colorways. We also invite you to take a look at our Dad Shoe Discounts page to keep up with the latest dad shoe sales.

FAQs About the Nike Air Monarch IV

Are Air Monarchs Considered Dad Shoes?

Yes, Air Monarchs are considered dad shoes. In fact, many people consider the Nike Air Monarch IVs the “King of Dad Shoes,” even though it was released over 25 years after the first dad shoe dropped.

What Makes the Nike Monarch IV Popular?

The Nike Monarch IV is popular because of its iconic dad shoe design, comfort, and affordability. It’s also an extremely durable shoe that provides steady traction.

What Is the Nike Air Monarch Good For?

The Nike Air Monarch is good for walking, traveling, working out, running errands, and tackling chores around the house. It’s also known for being one of the best lawn-mowing shoes.

Who Wears Air Monarchs?

Dads used to be the only ones who wore Air Monarchs. But in recent years, the Nike Air Monarch IV has also become a huge hit among the younger crowd, including Millennials and Gen Zers. Celebrities, professional athletes and coaches, and anyone in the market for dad shoe deals are also often drawn to Air Monarchs.

How Much Do Air Monarchs Cost?

Air Monarchs usually retail for around $85 at Amazon and through other retailers. However, the price you pay will ultimately depend on everything from your shoe size to your preferred Nike Air Monarch IV colorways.

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